January 4, 2012

Stop Hammer Time

“…most look silly, and others look dumb…”
~ MC Hammer, “Turn This Mutha Out”

Let’s begin this post by stating clearly that I am not opposed to full-figured avatars; I quite like them. Broad hips have been a sign of sensuality and fertility pretty much since the dawn of humankind, and a curvy gal strutting her stuff has my unqualified “you go girl” support. This post is not about projecting a negative body image onto the otherwise hiptastic.

This is not about shape; it’s about style.

I try to keep a sense of humor about some of the trends that pop up in SL “fashion.” When every other blog post in the feeds was some girl sporting elf ears with a hundred piercings, it gave me a chuckle. When the “I’m so hip and urban” kids were constantly wearing their lycan paw boots that make them look like a Budweiser Clydesdale in phat pants, it was a riot. The salvation in those situations that let the amusement flow was the fact that these were niche products by second or third tier designers. No harm. No foul. No need to call in the troops.

However.

When a top designer chases a horrible trend, it stops being funny. Why? Because time wasted making fashion abomination could have gone into something really nummy (like a modern take on Scarlett O’Hara’s beaded burgundy party gown that I’ve been dying for a top quality designer to attempt since…ever!).

So, I have a question. WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS? And THIS? And THIS? And THIS?

This is not a celebration of the female form. This is not emphasizing curvy hips. This is not even drop-crotch low hanging grunge / hip hop baggy retro ickiness. This is some sort of conspiracy or social experiment or mad virtual design serial killer gone wild and the grid needs a serious intervention.

Ladies, please take a long look at your avatars. If someone could ride on your ass like a camel hump and/or if you could pass as a stand-in for Grimace in a McDonald’s commercial, you need help. And it’s okay, we’re here for you. The first step is admitting you have a problem, and well, you’ve seen the photos so that should be easy. The second step is to go into your inventory and do a search for “Spirit Store” and just delete anything that comes up. Sure there might be a good item or two in the mix, but you simply cannot take the chance. Next, drop a notecard on ShaySibrian (creator of Celoe’s Nikola Trousers) and explain to them that you have a problem, but you’re in recovery now and they should not waste another MOMENT of their amazing talent on parachute pants. You bought them while under the possession of a fashion demon or something, but you’re doing much better now and they should not use your pre-exorcism purchase to skew their data in regards to user feedback. There isn’t enough mesh on the grid yet for Hammer pants to get a turn. You don’t want to be responsible for this sticking.

Finally, turn to the mirror and repeat to yourself “The walrus was Paul and if he doesn’t dress like one, neither should I.”

Seriously, kids. It’s all fun and games until someone ends up with cement hips and an ass full of Fix-a-Flat.

If you feel yourself slipping remember that all of the below are BAD BAD BAD:

Saggy Bottoms: What Not To Do

Saggy Bottoms: What Not To Do

And if someone you know is suffering from this affliction, remember: Friends don’t let friends dress like weeble wobbles.

December 29, 2011

Salome-Sized Makeover

“Things do not change; we change.” ~ Henry David Thoreau

Mesh has rekindled my love of shopping for pretty things in SL. Although, as a consumer I am concerned about some of the practices mesh seems to be bringing with it, the quality and performance of the products tickles my pixel vanity in all those yummy little spots that make me squee.

Since mesh clothing cannot currently be fitted, I have been doing a lot of tweaking to my avatar and about two weeks ago I did an evaluation of lil miss Salome. It turned out that I hadn’t made any major adjustments to my shape since May of 2007; I had been wearing the same skin since March of 2009, and I’d been wearing the same textured eyes since July of 2006. I wasn’t using any of the prim or cosmetic enhancement accessories that are available today and my customization of the base of my avatar was downright skimpy.

This was clearly not acceptable.

Partly for fun and partly because prissy girls loathe a rut when they recognize one, I decided to update my shape, my skin, and my “body accessories.”

The Shape

When I first started SL, Salome was much shorter, to reflect my RL height. I spent at least a month tweaking the facial settings the way I wanted them. After getting tired of being asked if I was a hobbit and having trouble fitting my clothing, I adjusted her shape to be taller. Although I kept my face settings, I went to Colette’s Body Shop (Colette Meiji’s store at the time) and let her do the hard work and math regarding the shape and proportions, (to be honest I even tweaked those body sliders so much they had very little in common with what I first purchased). Once Linden Lifestyles got popular and we were getting hundreds of items a day, I tailored my shape to fit the SL shopping norms for quick try-ons and product evaluation. After May of 2007 “Salome” was established and her shape hadn’t really been touched.

Now that I no longer have the obligation to go through hundreds of items per day and I don’t care about taking some extra time to fit things, I feel comfortable going back to a “me” that is shorter than the 6′ tall lanky lass I’ve been wandering about in for so long. I had a friend help me with scaling things like arm length and other math challenged settings. The result was exactly what I wanted and closer to what I’d first created back in my earliest SL days.

The face was a different story. Part of me wanted to keep Salome’s face exactly the same, but for one thing — the mouth. I used to enjoy the toonish mouth with the upturned corner smile lines and thin upper lip. But I created this exaggerated expression during the LL days for a PR purpose; it seemed a good choice for posting my image over and over with my oft-cranky writing. I felt the friendlier avatar would convey that the majority of my grumblings are intended without bite. But I have oft longed for fuller, more realistic, pout-a-lucious lips. It was easier than I had thought (or maybe I’m just getting to that age where having a little work done doesn’t seem like such an offensive idea).

The bottom line: Salome-sized has now become slightly shorter, a tiny bit plumper and, as ever, downright lippy.

Salome-Sized

Salome-Sized: The New "Me"

The Skin

For reasons no fashion-addicted creature should be able to fathom, I always been inexplicably loyal to certain skin lines. It’s not because of any connection with the creator. For a great deal of my SL life, I wore “Quad Brat” skins and there was certainly no love lost between me and the creator of them — but what I like, I like, and if a creator’s products are high quality I have a hard time accepting less.

I have really only worn three skins long-term in SL:

Celestial Studios (Passport) > Celestial Studios (Vogue) > LAQ (Elin/Fair)

I reviewed skins and would even, on occasion, try an odd one out just to see if I could get used to it. I love Gala/Curio, for example, but they just never felt right on me. And, as much as I have delighted in being an LAQ girl for the last two years, I didn’t want to just accept a new LAQ skin as my only option.

So I flitted around and collected demos for all the pale skins that looked halfway decent in their ads. I went to every store mentioned in the blogs I read and asked friends for their favorites. At the end of the harvest I had just under forty demos. Forty. Fucking. Demos. It took two days to whittle the contestants down, but I had two sets of criteria to help with the culling — the “Non-Negotiable” factors and the “Preferences” factors.

Non-Negotiable:
A. Nice highlight and shading without over-exaggeration or “muddy” shadows;
B. A clean face without heavy make-up;
C. Healthy body definition and details;
D. Professional blending of photo-realism and airbrush without too much of either;
E. Light, creamy, pale shade.

Preferences:
A. Auburn brows and hairbase;
B. Bald kitty without any vulgar emphasis on bits or rough looking bits;
C. Larger, darker areolae.

One by one, demos were deleted. I was surprised at how many skins today still over-glam everything with baked on cosmetics that included exaggerated blush on even more exaggerated cheekbones and hooker-lined fish lips. There is so much tattoo make-up on the grid to help customize; any skin that doesn’t have a clean face “base” version in their packs shouldn’t even be considered by a consumer. Frankly I think skin makers today would be smart to only sell their base skin and then put up a mountain of cosmetic options, but I am not yet queen. Also, the faces on many skins are too tight for my liking; when using their included brow settings, they have that pissed off model look I can’t stand. Other skin makers need to learn that “pale” doesn’t equal “slightly less tan.” Still more had horrible shading on the bum and under-breast areas or that over-airbrushed wet-paint spray-tan look that is too shiny in all the wrong places. A few had great body work, but cringe-worthy facial lighting that seemed like they’d tried to bake on highlights while the model was holding a flashbulb in her teeth.

The list goes on, but at the end of the day I had narrowed it to two: LAQ‘s Ebba in the new Ivory tone option and Gala Phoenix’s Visitor in Moonbeam. I liked the Gala a lot, but I just liked the LAQ slightly more. And, it must be said, that as a consumer, I prefer LAQ‘s pricing practices over Gala‘s (although I disapprove of some of the tactics LAQ employs to make their brows only work on their skins, etc). I think part of it was also that I’ve just been so happy with LAQ for so long that I felt they deserved the extra tilt with everything else being even.

Forty demos. Two days of trying on and looking in different light settings. Still, I ended up where I started – an LAQ skin. Go figure.

Salome Makeover

Old Sal | New Sal | Newer Sal

Body Accessories

With multiple attach points and tattoo layers, avatar customization in SL is sweeter candy now more than ever for a virtual paper doll addict like me. Why haven’t I been taking advantage of this? No clue. But with my shape and skin decided, I went all happy crazy with accessories.

Eyes. I have love, love, loved my E’s Handpainted eyes, but their quality level is from 2006 and there are oodles of new eyes with more impressive detail work. I switched from brown eyes to grey sometime in 2007 and since then I’ve purchased pretty much every pair of grey eyes I’ve run across just to see if anything would please me. But I’ve found most eyes are too small; I prefer larger irises and pupils. As fate would have it, while at Curio picking up Gala skin demos, I noticed the Tragic eyes. Not only did I fall head over heels for the Light Grey, but I finally found prim eyes that are easy to fit and provide a hint of luster without being too shiny. My peepers are happy campers. You may have heard the squee in your remote corners of the grid.

Hair/Brows. I had already decided to go more auburn than brown, bumping my hair habit from Truth‘s Pecan in the Browns pack to Jupiter in the Gingers pack. LAQ already had brows for Ebba which I snagged and the Red 1 is a nice red brow with a little darker shade than the 2 or 3. Since I don’t care for the Truth hairbases and LAQ didn’t have hers out yet, I scooted over to Amacci and found out their hairbases on tattoo layers are now FREE (Amacci‘s Henna is the counterpart of Truth‘s Jupiter, btw). So full of win. I am a little disappointed that League doesn’t have red hairbases because I really admire their hairbases, but I’ll survive for the time being. Someone eventually has to come out with a nice widow’s peak.

Lashes. As lashes go, I had put off the prim lash revolution for the simple reason that fitting them was, in my experience, a particularly ornery breed of bitch. So I bit the bullet, asked random strangers for their preferences and did some experimentation. What I finally decided was that I wanted to use a combination of both alpha and non-alpha lashes. For alpha lashes, Redgrave has a nice selection and the Luscious lashes were perfect for my needs. They come with an alpha layer that hides your system lashes. Yay. I’ve only been trying to do that since 2005. To those I added the LeLutka “Curl” full prim lashes, and this combo seemed to give me the zazazoo I was going for. I’m still tweaking here and there, but we’re definitely cooking with gas.

Make-Up. There is an obscenely wonderful selection of tattoo cosmetics on the grid. How much do I love not having to buy a new skin every time I want to change my lip stick? Yes. THAT FRAKKIN’ MUCH. First I ran over to PixelDolls which is soon to be no more, and snagged all her L$50 cosmetic eye shadow sets. The one I’m wearing in the far right photo is from the Rocket Fuel pack and the shade I’m wearing is Ashes. Its perfect for a nice, bold, smoky eye. For the lips, I’ve been taking advantage of Hush‘s Juicy lipstick colors, and what you see in the right photo is one of the tattoos from their reds pack. Because I wanted a beauty mark, I did a lot of looking around and finally clicked with a little mouth mole from Launa Fauna. Yes. My tattoo layers have tattoo layers.

The Outfit

I wanted something simple and non mesh for this entry as clothes go. There is still a lot of great stuff on the grid that isn’t mesh, and I think we’re finally to a point in avatar customization where the options for attractive, immersive products are the norm rather than the exception. For dresses, skirts, and body supplements (like toes) it will likely be mesh or nothing, but for tops and pants, there is still a lot that texturing and sculpts have to offer.

Exhibit A. If you do not have this delicately feminine Seashell Blouse from League you need to go now. It is a non-optional necessity which I cannot stop wearing. The whispery nature of this textured on treat is utterly irresistible and comes on all three top layers (as you would expect) in oodles of colors. So often in SL “sexy” is really just “trashy” but this top is sweet and feminine as well as dripping with smexy.

The jeans are my favorite old school staples from Plastik. As far as I know, however, these Vigos are only available on the marketplace in a huge fatpack. You get a baker’s dozen of colors and each of those comes in loose, skinny, capri, shorts, and jean skirt options with prim sculpted cuffs and hobo flares. I know that mesh pants are all the rage just now, but I’m finding most of these first offerings too…rubbery. I still find a lot of value in fabric textured items to mingle with my mesh (at least until mesh pants stop looking like liquid latex).

The shoes are a delightful little pair of cork wedges from Duh!. When you just need a casual kick-around pair of Espadrilles you can’t really knock these for their price. They have their issues out-of-box, but they are mod, include alpha layers for 2.0+ viewers and are cheap cheap cheap, so I won’t pick them apart. They’re darling for what they are.

So if you’re wandering about and you happen to see a shorter, paler, more red-headed version of me, you needn’t worry about virtual alien abduction. I’m still here, I just changed my ribbons an wrapping paper.

Where Does She Get Those Wonderful Toys:

Skin: LAQ – Ebba in Ivory 5Pack – L$990 (Brows L$290)
Lashes: Redgrave – Luscious Alpha Lashes (L$90) and LeLutka Curl Prim Lashes (L$180)
Lips: HushJuicy Lips Red Pack- L$125
Eyes: Curio – Tragic Eyes in Light Grey – L$125
Eye Liner / Shadow: PixelDolls – Rocket Fuel 8Pack – L$50
Mole: Launa Fauna, Bayonetta – L$7 / L$15
Hair: TruthJolie in Jupiter – L$250 (Gingers Color Pack)

Blouse: League – Seashell Blouse – L$115
Jeans: PlastikVigos Jeans Fatpack – L$599
Shoes: Duh! - Women’s Espadrilles – L$60 (For the Fat Pack. Not even kidding)

Filed under: Hair SL,Second Life,Skins SL,SL - Fun,SL - Shopping,Virtual Living by Salome at 12:00 PM

June 30, 2011

Strangers With Songs

“The poet ranks far below the painter in the representation of visible things, and far below the musician in that of invisible things.” ~ Leonardo da Vinci

There are odd little paths we walk in virtuality.

When I joined SL, I had already been a writer for most of my life. When I was very little, I would cross out the parts of my storybooks I didn’t care for and rewrite them to my liking. As a tween I wrote terribly cheesy horror stories to try and shock the adults who endured listening to them (to their credit, they pretended to be disgusted enough to sate the miscreant in me). As a full-fledged teenager, I did that whole weeping heart in my poetry journal thing. In college I learned I was never going to become the reincarnation of Oscar Wilde; that took some time to heal. As a young adult I embraced the fact that while artful talent might take its sweet time to develop, I had an inherent skill that not everyone gets a chance to wield.

As an adult I have learned that a muse is a fickle whore of a creature and you take what you can grab from her when she deigns to show herself. Between visits you take turns hating her and pining for her and stitching together the remnants of your ego in cold sweat anticipation of her return.

My particular failing is a lack of brevity. If allowed the space, I will ruin my own writing with length. Even knowing this, I never considered myself a particularly good poet, nor did I ever consider that I’d have any gift for lyrics. It was only at the coaxing of musician friends in SL that I shared some scribblings. When I did, quite unexpectedly, a whole new world of collaboration and expression opened up for me.

I have been writing with Grace and Lyndon since 2007. January or February or June depending on how you want to start counting. I shared Lugo with Lyndon that January and wrote Fallen State of Grace for the girl in February. But it was late June when I sent Boxes to Lyndon and Last Chance to Grace and first heard them put their music styles to my words.

I don’t pretend to be able to express what it’s like to hear your poetry come out of someone else’s lips in a way you never imagined it yourself. I suppose, on an intellectual level, it’s a little like watching someone you love hold your child for the first time. There is a tender pride and a confusing loss that take place in tandem. You are parting with something that will never be wholly yours again, but in that giving there’s a sense of incredible connection.

Both of them have been performing collaborative songs for four years now. Four. Years. I consider myself to be at their mercy in many ways. Without me, both of them could go on to write and perform. Without them, this strange new way I’ve found to use my inner voice would be gone. I suppose I should be frightened by that, but I’ve never felt that way. I send them my scribblings and sometimes they like them enough to imbue their magic into my words. It’s a system that suits me. But I’m never quite able to get my head around hearing them play.

For a while now, Lyndon has taken to playing our songs at open mics around Seattle. And that’s where one of his musician friends heard him play our latest song, The Dangerous, and asked for a chart so he could work it up.

So today, I opened my mail and had a link to the above youtube video. It features a guy I’ve never met, never heard, never seen until today singing words I wrote. It’s one of the most strange, surreal three minutes and fifty one seconds I’ve ever experienced. Myriad flavors of emotion I haven’t begun to identify. (Although, I need to find out how to get in touch with him, if only to find out what the hell is going on with his lamp).

I get angry and frustrated with Linden Lab, Second Life, and humanity in general. I get exhausted by my disappointment at watching so much possibility squandered.

But some days I come face to face with the paths and possibilities that keep me on this particular road, and I remind myself that no one promised it would be paved in yellow bricks or lead to bejeweled cities. But the road does weave its way into places I could never otherwise explore or encounter, and I have to concede these small moments of awe.

People often ask one another why they stay in Second Life. I have several answers, but the one that I can’t get away from is that as a creative thinker and a tentative artist, there is nothing in virtuality that offers me the at-my-fingertips tools to unfurl the creative sinew more than SL. One day maybe open sims, etc will catch up. I embrace the possibilities of what is to come. But I’ve looked around at the newborns slouching toward Bethlehem and they don’t have the juice to fill my jelly jar yet. I’m beyond the whole novelty of the environment part. I’ve logged my time in someone else’s growing pains. If it’s not ready for prime time, call me later.

From now on, I’ll have a much simpler answer.

Why am I still here? That’s just the dangerous in me.

June 14, 2011

Daenerys Targaryen – Drakyn Tamer

“He was no dragon. Fire cannot kill a dragon.” ~ Emilia Clarke as Daenerys Targaryen (via Jane Espenson, David Benioff, D.B. Weiss, and/or George R.R. Martin)

Daenerys Targaryen Tames the Drakyns

Daenerys Targaryen Tames the Drakyns

It all started innocently enough. Sax Shepherd Designs finally released their Animated Drakyn companions and I wanted to write a follow-up to my video blog preview. Lately due to fever, I’d been catching up on Game of Thrones. Yes, I know, Martin lacks a certain amount of creative talent and is devoid of any gift with prose… and he blatantly steals draws significant inspiration from every major fantasy series that came before his, but HBO and Jane Espenson pairing was enough to make me give it a go.

And of course, the moment I realized I had pet dragons to play with, I had to play dress up as Daenerys Targaryen.

Large Drakyn

Large Drakyn

I really didn’t think it would be so hard. And it started well. I took a trip to Truth and a purchased two “light blonde” packs — one that would suit the character and one that would allow for proper display of jewelry and upper body purchases. That took two minutes. Next, I remembered that my Shiny Things Boho Sandals are still awesome and up to par for even a Dothraki khaleesi. Next, for the trappings, I thought, no problem. In writing his novels, Martin leaned on existing fantasy tropes like a drunk on a sagging bar, and as we all know, John Norman’s Gorean environments thrive in Second Life. So I’ll just find some Tuchuk/She-Urt/Panther wrappings and be done.

Daenerys Targaryen Outfit

Daenerys Targaryen Outfit

Three hours later, I finally had an outfit I felt comfortable with. Before I continue, it’s important to realize that I am both spoiled and picky. I don’t spend a lot of time in stores that fall below market standards these days, and a vast majority of creators for fantasy/costume wear of this sort are not up to the standard a fashion blogger would be accustomed to. Items do not come on multiple layers. Resizing scripts (if they exist) are badly scripted and not as customer-friendly as the more current offerings. Skirts in general are skirts only in the sense that they go around the hips and sort of dangle. The vast majority of “skirts” offered in the Gorean costume markets I visited were just badly textured scraps of flex prims. But that’s okay because most of the tops covered only a single breast if you were lucky. I get the impression the avatars that purchase these types of outfits aren’t wearing them for long or for the purpose of taming dragons.

The bulk of the outfit above comes from Torvis Gorean Weapons and Bina.

Let’s go over the Torvis stuffs first. The top was the main reason for the purchase, but the outfit seemed a background offering meant to be a bonus for the sale of the dagger included in the outfit (at least the dagger seemed to be the main focus of the advertising). The full skirt is actually better done than most, but it’s no-mod and the resizing scripts were obnoxious. Because of this, I couldn’t get the belt narrow enough for my hips without exposing my ass. So, I shopped and shopped and shopped until I found something else. Also, the top by itself exposed my left breast. Because it’s on the shirt layer (and only the shirt layer) it was a little frustrating to mix and match with.

Yes, I know. If I were using 2.0 it wouldn’t matter because I could have multiple things on the same layer. Imprudence isn’t offering that yet.

Daenerys Targaryen Support Outfits

Daenerys Targaryen Support Outfits

On the left is the “Tende Slave Rags” outfit from Bina. Bina is one of the very few stores I visited that offered what I consider to be market-worthy products. Their prims were nicely done and nicely textured. There was some creativity in the pieces offered and most of them were on multiple layers. For medieval costuming, Bina and Vigo, were the best costumers I found (although nothing at Vigo struck me for this outfit – maybe a later entry). They’re not quite up to the quality of Evie’s Closet, but they’re close with lots of potential. The slave rags outfit has what may be the best all-prim waist sarong ever. It’s modify and copy (I re-tinted it in the previous photo) so the right textures could make it perfect for a swimsuit wrap for your beachy wear. Or, if you wanna play a little “You Tarzan, Me Jane” in the backyard, this outfit works for that, too.

On the right is the “Panther Scout” outfit from May Tolsen of May’s Soul. I wanted this for the leather straps that go around the top (they are a different layer from the shirt beneath) to hide the previously mentioned exposed breast. Unfortunately they only came on the shirt layer (suddenly, I’m shopping in SL 2007). I IMed May and she was an absolute sweetheart. She uploaded them for me on an undershit layer and then fought with me over trying to pay her for her time (I think she finally let me give her L$250 over the cost of the outfit, which is not NEARLY enough for a custom request, but some designers are just too kind for their own good).

And I was *so close* to being done.

Daenerys Targaryen Jewelry

Daenerys Targaryen Jewelry

Luckily I knew just where to go for jewelry. Previously, I had discovered TRIDENT while seeking dock supplies for the Freudian Slip. These “Lunnuitsa” bronze and ivory pieces are beyond perfect. I’ve always loved ivory, but it’s, of course, reprehensible to own any in reality. So being able to slip some on in the pixel is a nice treat. Plus, wearing bone helps keep the drakyns under thumb. If they get cheeky you can just tell them you’ll make a necklace out of them.

Where Does She Get Those Wonderful Toys?

Drakyn Animated Dragons – L$1475
Sax Shepherd Designs – Here Be Drakyns
Creator: Sax Shepherd
SLURL

SHAYNA PACK (Top & Big Skirt) – L$375
TORVIS GOREAN WEAPONS
Creator: Torvis Rainfall
SLURL

Panther Scout – L$250
May’s Soul
Creator: May Tolsen
SLURL

Lunnuitsa Necklace & Earrings – L$350 / L$250
TRIDENT
Creator: Rossana Llewellyn
SLURL

Tende Slave Rags – L$365
Bina
Creator: Cymoril Lightfoot
SLURL

Boho Sandals – L$250
Shiny Things
Creator: Fallingwater Cellardoor
SLURL

June 9, 2011

Consumer Rights in a Virtual World

“When people lack jobs, opportunity, and ownership of property they have little or no stake in their communities” ~ Jack Kemp

Eventually I’ll stop writing about this. But not today. I’m sick and feverish and unable to work, so prepare for one of those long-winded ones.

I used to think, with some inner sense of authority, that one of the major legal issues of the next decade will be consumer rights over virtual property. Over the last couple of years, I have remapped that in my mind to be: I *hope* one of the major legal issues of the next decade will be consumer rights over virtual property.

There is a worrisome nag in me that thinks people have become so complacent as consumers and dependent upon the next trend that they’ve abandoned the ability to advocate for themselves. As virtual products become more and more fundamental to our everyday lives, that’s a frustrating and somewhat terrifying prospect for the future of things I value like, say, free markets and democracies. When the general population just rolls over in regards to their own rights to privacy because Facebook is fun, a little slice of my hope for humanity dies. When they give no thought to their rights as consumers because a product or service isn’t physically tangible, the same happens.

It’s always harder to rebuild brand and value once the public takes a view that something isn’t worth defending. The “oh, it’s just a game” or “oh, it’s just a gadget” mentality allows corporations to take liberties with virtual goods they could never dream of taking with physical property. Given the amount of corporate influence in the political sphere these days (which doesn’t seem likely to lessen anytime soon) people have only themselves to trust in as advocates of their own rights. So what does it mean for a democratic republic when people will not behave in their own best interests and don’t teach their children to behave in their own best interests?

And how do you marry this tendency to abandon personal self-interest with the entitlement “I want it now” mindset that only seems to get worse as technology increases the speed with which “the new” is made available? At some point that feels like two trains speeding toward one another on the same track. I don’t know what the crash will look like, I just know it feels inevitable. And, let’s face it, “I want/deserve it now and I don’t care how I get it,” isn’t the best mantra for an advancing civilization. Leaving the morality aside, it tends to lead to other bad things like the fall of Rome and being on the losing side of wars.

By and large, my experiences with customer service in Second Life have been far more positive when dealing with residents and content creators than in dealing with the format itself. Smaller and more savvy content creators will almost always behave in good faith, despite dealing with a customer base that can lean a little over-entitled (Linden Lab’s dismal customer service history and policies are well established in my blog and others, no need to rehash). Just like the content available “in world,” the best examples come from members of the community and not from the platform itself (which should be setting a better example, but I’m trying really hard not to go there…again).

As big-name designers and design houses emerged, however, customer service standards in SL began to fluctuate more. For me, personally, Armidi was the first big example of that. The SIM was always packed with lots of active shoppers (not just traffic bots) and yet I never once got a response to numerous customer service inquiries (including delivery failures, accidental double-purchases due to SIM lag, mismarked/labeled products, among other issues). I’ve never known anyone who had a concern with Armidi that was ever addressed. As far as I can see, their policy was to put out their products and walk away. I’d have less of a problem with that, if they’d put a “shop at your own risk” sign out.

To be certain, providing good customer service in SL is difficult. There are often cultural differences and language barriers that can make interactions frustrating. When my texture store was in full swing back in the day, I developed an inner sense of “ugh” toward French and German inquiries — it’s much the same feeling I get when talking to someone who is obviously from Jersey — just because I knew the interaction wasn’t going to be easy. Consumers in SL often don’t understand the imposition of time custom requests impose upon creators and don’t hesitate to ask. I was frequently asked for custom requests that would have taken hours of Photoshopping, but for which the customer only wanted to pay L$250 or some other ridiculous amount. Telling these customers no, however gracefully, often led to rude responses. Other times, customers are just needy or crave attention and will chat you up at their leisure without bothering to ask if you are busy or expressing any concern for your own time. Still others will be hostile out of proportion to the situation when you just cannot do what they want, or cannot address something right away. Customer Service is a thin wire to navigate. It is an ironic axiom of SL, however, that often the people with the least to gain provide the best customer service experiences.

Second Life, as a platform and a community base, started out with the right mindset. They gave residents the groundbreaking SL permissions system (I like to think ithis was an idealistic gesture, although I’m sure there was the understanding that it would invest people into the platform). In the early days, sharing a creation was a pleasure because it was understood you were giving something that was yours, and I’m sure that mindset still exists, although the willy nilly tendency of people just to throw badly made crap into the inventory of others makes me wonder if that is completely lost. There is a difference in sharing something you invested time and care into and something you just want to throw at someone for attention, or in the hopes they’ll do something nice back. Too many people in the real and virtual worlds will never learn the differences in those acts.

But, I digress…

The early blogs at the time reflected the understanding of items as consumer products. One of the things I am most proud of when people stop to tell me about their early experiences with Linden Lifestyles is that they appreciated how we actually reviewed the products; we didn’t just plaster photos of ourselves up and call it a shopping blog. In fact, the way we took and presented photos on Linden Lifestyles was focused on making sure the product was presented truthfully so a consumer could get a realistic idea prior to purchase instead of aiming to make ourselves look like fashion icons. I don’t have any moral objection to fashion photoblogs, but it saddens me to see a million photos taken only to highlight the blogger’s photo skills or avatar slider settings while claiming to represent the products. They don’t want to be consumer advocates, and I understand that, but I do wish there was less “look at me” and more “let’s talk about the fit” in at least a few of the blogs.

Yes, I know there are many reasons for that. Consumers in SL can be taxing and hostile, but so can content creators. More often than not, unfortunately, content creators are unable to handle objective criticism of any kind and are only too willing to go crying to their facebook fans when someone has the audacity to point out their seams don’t line up, or the fit of their clothes is outside the norm for the average fashion avatar.

Case in point: I have nothing but admiration for the work of Aikea Rieko, the creator of Plastik, who, in my opinion puts out some great content. But not long ago she altered her profile to state that she did not provide blogging samples to critics. That Pick has since been removed, but I remember it because it floored me. I had been considering asking for a review sample and it completely turned me off — not just from blogging the outfit I’d gone there to find, but from purchasing at the store for a long while after. It blew my mind. Here was one of the better content creators in SL declaring an opposition to having their content truthfully reviewed in a critical blog. To this day, the only reviews listed on Plastik’s official blog are written by Plastik staff.

I know that when I want an objective review I go to the creator’s best friends for my info.

Sure, this is calling Aikea out a little and that’s not entirely fair to her — at least she is honest about her policies. Far more content creators hold grudges and play favorites and scheme behind the scenes rather than be upfront with their feelings on the subject. I use this example because what’s most shocking is that this is a creator that few would/could negatively blog about — the products offered by Plastik are almost always of high quality. For a product line of that level to be insecure and afraid of critical review demonstrates a sincere problem in the understanding of the purpose of consumer review. I understand blog samples being limited to only those blogs the creator finds deserving of samples via the blog audience, the quality of the writing/presentation and/or the tone of the blogger, but to restrict it only to people guaranteed to provide a happy, shiny uncritical review? That’s unfathomable to me.

Maitreya has a similar policy — stating that they don’t take requests for blog samples, but only bestow their product samples on bloggers who have “come to their attention.” Riiiiiight. I love a lot of Maitreya products – and I begrudgingly blog them because I take a great deal of offense to their pricing structure. That said, on the two occasions I had to deal with customer service for Maitreya products, it was handled promptly and politely. But I also take offense to the “don’t ask, we’ll give them to you if you please the crown” attitude toward blogging.

So, I have sympathy for bloggers in their dealing with drama breathing content creators. I have sympathy for content creators dealing with entitled, oblivious consumers and vindictive bloggers who just enjoy saying vile things to generate views. I have had my share of dealing with all of these things, and far more than most.

Despite this imperfect and somewhat exhausting system, there still has to be a place for consumer rights to be aired if Second Life is going to last, even as an avatar customization and/or activity format.

Here’s a depressing postcard from the current state of affairs regarding the new golden child of the grid: Meeroos.

Recently, I had to deal with Meeroo Customer Support.

Because of my involvement in the beta program I was awarded with an ugly green rat as a “gift” for helping them test their systems. One of my friends who still plays with rats said she wanted it because it could be worth L$5 – L$10k on the secondary market. So I dropped the “nest” on her. When she attempted to rez it, it didn’t rez and it didn’t return to her inventory or L&F, even after reboots with cleared caches, etc. Although I’ve never had that happen in SL before, I’ve heard of SL just eating no-copy objects, so I supposed they had to have a system in place for her to find redress (the object had been given into her inventory, so I figured anything that needed to be taken care of would be handled by her).

A few days later, I was IMed and asked if I could deal with a Meeroo CSRep because their system still showed me as the owner. Expecting they’d just drop a new rat nest on me, I said sure.

The CSR asked for a teleport to my property and asked to be taken to my Meeroo stump. I explained that I had only participated in the beta and wasn’t playing the game, so I didn’t have a stump. She then informed me that I couldn’t get a replacement unless I purchased a meeroo stump. I was further told that the nest could not be replaced in its nest form, that only a “birthed” Meeroo could be supplied. All of this was couched in language to blame the Second Life format and not the limitations of the Meeroo system, starting with the beginning of our conversation when she stated: “SL didn’t register the transfer, so the nest is still under your name.”

It will seem pedantic to clarify this statement, but I feel it’s important. SL, did, in fact, register the transfer. It shows up clearly in my transaction history. What she should have said was that the Meeroo tracking system was unable, for whatever reason, to grab notice of the exchange from SL. One of those statements blames SL, the other accepts responsibility and moves forward to solving the problem.

Even still, why shouldn’t my word have been enough for them to manually update the record in their database with the correct owner? I’m not a teenager trying to use Mom’s credit card at the Gap in this situation – my identity as the owner isn’t in question and she knows she’s talking to me because SL shows my identity to her clearly. It’s one of the few advantages of the system. Sure, Meeroo central may have showed me as owner, but if I say I give permission for the rat’s ownership to be transferred to my friend, that should be the end of my involvement. Right?

No. It turns out not so much.

Before I continue, let me say that I have a personal policy regarding going off on customer service staff, especially in cases of policy. I did express my disbelief over such an illogical system and my displeasure with it, but her company’s idiocy wasn’t her fault, so there was no reason to take her to further task. I don’t believe there’s ever a reason to be abusive to, well, anyone. As angry as I am, the most I can generally muster is really heavy sarcasm. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve behaved badly to a CSR and they were all cases of extreme emotional distress (like dealing with an uncooperative insurance adjuster trying to double talk me after enduring a natural disaster). There might be a healthy swear word or two thrown into the mix when I’m frustrated, but I am, by nature, almost unable to address that to a person directly. If I’m very provoked, I might huff out something like “That is the stupidest damn system I’ve ever heard” but I cannot fathom saying something like: “you are the stupidest damn person I’ve ever dealt with.” Badly trained CSRs will personalize any expression of consumer frustration and will not understand the difference between a consumer expressing displeasure over policy as opposed to the rep, but that’s bad training and you can’t fix that as a consumer. Their employer placed them on the front line and it’s not your fault they were sent out unprepared for duty. Consumers expressing frustration is one way companies get feedback on how popular/unpopular their policies are. So long as complaints aren’t abusive they are part of the consumer responsibility process.

I bring this up only to emphasize that despite feeling I was being deliberately misinformed and pressured into accepting a system that was disadvantageous to the consumer, I played nice. However, I fully expect a consumer with less experience and lower personal standards might have been voicing their displeasure in far more creative ways than I did. And, while there’s never any excuse for bad behavior, there’s also no excuse for Meeroo CSRs to employ tactics and carry out policies certain to inspire bad behavior.

At any rate, I got the stump, returned to my property L$250 poorer, and waited for the situation to end so I could go to bed. Unfortunately, the girl continued to try and “be right” explaining (without prompting) that the situation was a limitation of SL in dealing with their database, etc. Again, the language was to blame SL and used phrases like “only choice” and “no other way” that set my teeth to aching with the desire to retrain the girl on how to speak to customers. I’m pretty sure my avatar was twitching in sympathy with the nerves in my RL temples, but I just went to my happy place, lay back, and thought of England. Eventually I got the green rat, threw it at my friend, made sure she could rez it, and logged out.

It should be said, and LOUDLY, that there is no limitation presented by SL that would prohibit any product from being delivered to a consumer. That limitation is strictly with the Meeroo database and the coding of their product. Malevay Studios didn’t forsee or didn’t care about replacing products in the unbirthed state to consumers. They also didn’t forsee or didn’t care about returning products to those who didn’t have a Meeroo stump/home whatever (makes you wonder how they replace lost stumps). SL has nothing to do with these self-imposed restrictions. Shoving responsibility for them onto SL is nothing short of misinforming consumers.

After some venting, my friend also passed along a notecard of a customer service conversation between a high profile person in the Malavoy Studios organization and a third party customer. In that particular situation, the person had several items and Meeroos disappear only to be told they had no choice but to go to Linden Lab — that Malevay Studios was not responsible for replacing the objects (the person was later properly addressed by another CSR who took care of the situation). Apparently as far at the initial contact was concerned, all that back and forth scripted tracking between SL and the Malavoy database wasn’t for the protection of the consumer at all. Interesting point of view from a company claiming to be committed to providing top service to their customers. Maybe they were just having a bad day, but it’s curious that was such an early response from one of the top names associated with Meeroos, especially when you consider that such problems must certainly have been anticipated in the early stages of release.

I’m unable to find an official policy on the replacement of lost objects on the Meeroo site, although it might be buried somewhere in the dismally written lore — I can’t do more than scan that page. I’m also unable to find any area that addresses why Meeroo nests can’t be replaced except in their “birthed” form (conveniently, the form in which Meeroos consume food that has to be paid for with L$).

I’m not familiar enough with breedables to know how common it is for a company to be unable to replace a unit in the unbirthed state, so feel free to let me know if the other products do this as well. Pressuring your customers into accepting altered products for replacement is hinky at best.

Meeroos have tried to brand themselves as being a far more community-oriented and customer friendly breedable than past breedables, but they’ve already updated their policies to distance themselves from CS issues and have opted to hide behind a ticket system rather than hire additional staff. I can respect that to a point — ticket systems are good for keeping track and having a “paper trail” to follow. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have “on duty” CSRs to address immediate concerns, or issues that fall outside the norm.

There’s also a lack of commitment in educating consumers about their clunky product. Malevay appears, instead, to be choosing to rely on a badly written user manual that only addresses a fraction of consumer concerns and other players in the community to help new members learn how to enter the “game.” This is problematic when you realize that much like the SL fashion community, the Meeroo community is highly populated with fangirls and sycophants who will trounce anyone for expressing a concern or try to get a hard question answered in group chat. I dropped the Meeroo group after beta closed, but I’d seen enough during beta to confirm that I wanted nothing to do with most of the people who spent time in that group chat.

Recently, according to most of my sources, there is increasing concern over the Meeroo “Regard” point system. Information provided to users is sketchy and somewhat contradicts, leaving players unsure if there is actually a plan for Regard, or if Malevay is just making it up as they go along, hoping to capitalize on the competitive nature of instituting a point system without going to the pesky trouble of actually outlining the purpose of the system (or even having one).

During beta, it was expressed by the creators that Regard would play a key role in limiting “power breeders” from taking over the game and/or secondary market and that special rewards and traits would be based on Regard. They seemed to have walked that back a little, no doubt having realized that power breeders put a good amount of money into their product, but have not clarified in any official capacity that I can find. In notecards (distributed with permission) between creators and concerned parties, the Malevay position has been to state that they don’t intend to provide details of this aspect of the product because “figuring it out is part of the game,” but allude that they might have more to say in the future.

Guys? Figuring out the rules to a game is not part of the game. Rules are provided so people know how to play a game, then players figure out strategies and discover new aspects of play. Maybe Malevay shouldn’t be creating games if they’re that unclear on game concepts. Telling people Regard might count, or might not seems deliberately obscure and misleading to capitalize on confusion. You don’t have to tell people “benefit X is unlocked at Y points” but you should tell them if something new is, in fact, going to be unlocked upon reaching a proper score.

There were even comments made that Regard would only be used for reward merchandise, although that was not specified either. Is Regard going to only be something that contributes to getting a discount on coffee mugs and mousepads, or some decor product that has nothing to do with the game? Building a point system into a game that doesn’t have anything to do with game goals should be something players know from the start. Enticing people to invest money and time in something without giving them all the facts is a crummy way to run a lemonade stand.

Hiding behind “it’s part of the game” is a convenient dodge that customers shouldn’t be letting this company get away with. Under those conditions there will never be any obligation to clarify which aspects of the game are important or what will lead to reward. It also, obviously, cloaks errors from being recognized by players and provides no leverage on behalf of the consumer base to having them addressed.

Right now the reward system is worth nothing and encourages players to buy Meeroos, click on them once per hour for an extended period of time, and then delete them (“release them to the wild” in game terms). Think about that, if you’re building reward in your Meeroos. Without having any idea why, you have purchased a pretend pet, clicked it over and over, and deleted it in exchange for…points. And what are these points good for? You don’t know?

*facepalm*

I’m trying to imagine the response if Blizzard had said they weren’t going to reveal what benefits honor points would provide in their PVP system, or what you’d have access to with arena points.

The two biggest responses I saw to concerns like these while still in the Meeroo group chat were always:
1. “This is new, you shouldn’t be so hard on the product.”
2. “This is so much better than prior breedables, you should be grateful to them for making a better product.”

Dear Meeroo consumers,

Please, try to have enough respect for yourselves to recognize:

1. This product has gone live after a formal beta process and the creators/owners have made, conservatively, in the ballpark of $200k USD judging from an exterior examination of the product data available. This company is no longer entitled to play the dumb blonde *giggle* card. They can and should evolve and adapt their policies to fit their learning curve, but that does not give them a pass on answering the hard questions and accepting responsibility to properly service, educate, and inform their user base. If you give them a pass, you’re insuring that you will get a less enjoyable product.

2. No matter what bad product came before, there is never an excuse for poor customer service other than failure on behalf of the provider. If you think that it’s okay for a creator to provide bad service because someone else did, too, ask yourself if it would be okay if your credit card company neglected to refund you for a failed transaction just because other credit card companies might do the same. You are *paying* for this product and your reasonable expectations should be met, regardless of competing products. By all means, be patient, encouraging, and supportive of the products you like in SL. But when you forget to advocate for your own consumer rights because a bunch of make-believe rats are “sooooo cute” you’re sinking your own ship and assuring yourself that your choices in the future will be more limited and more draconian.

Okay. Juice now. Then sleep.

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